Presented by: Josh CruverKibi, MA, BSL
Are we alone in the Universe? What does it mean to feel existentially isolated despite having relationships with others? Is avoiding perceptions of isolation worth giving up autonomy, freewill, and individuality to the authorities and structures of our society?
Existential isolation is the conscious awareness of the gulf between perceptions of oneself and the perceptions of others (Corsini & Wedding, 2011). This creates a perception of dread, like the existential dreads for freedom, personal responsibility, purpose and meaning, and mortality, that it is inevitable for certain ideas to be in flux throughout our lives and may never be known for certain. We are forced to balance the tension between desperately wanting and trying to make connections with others, and the nagging dread that we can still perceive ourselves alone at times despite our efforts (Corsini & Wedding, 2011).
We are also perpetually fighting for our freedom and autonomy from the societal authority structures and pressures throughout our lives, while never really knowing exactly what will feel freeing and autonomous. Fyodor Dostoyevsky wrote about this struggle for autonomy and dread of self-examination while being pulled and pressured by societal imperatives in his short story, Notes from the Underground, “I am alone and they are everyone”. The inability for the individual to predict or measure all outcomes is the crux of both existential dread and essence of freewill. Freewill is intentionally choosing, even when we are not able to perceive the outcome of our choices. We may intentionally choose our current logic, ethics code, moral conclusion, etc.…, over our strong feelings, societal or authority pressures, or even choosing an action that could lead to danger and death.
Some have argued that we do not have freewill due to comparing existential perception to physics equations or deductive verbal philosophical authority arguments. The cognitive logic that we do not have freewill is quite consequential. If we accept the deterministic logic that there is no freewill, or we have no autonomy to choose, if we cognitively submit to the authority of others, we are what Erich Fromm refers to as an automaton.
“By conforming with the expectations of others, by not being different, these doubts about one’s identity are silenced and a certain security is gained. However, the price paid is high. Giving up spontaneity and individuality results in a thwarting of life. Psychologically the automaton, while being alive biologically, is dead emotionally and mentally. While he goes through the motions of living, his life runs through his hands like sand (Fromm, 1941)”.
Yes, there are deductive arguments, absolute observable measurements, and facts, such as math and physics. However, subjective perceptions are not currently measurable at the accuracy of physics applications. And deductions are only as good as the discipline of the user at setting accurate premises. Freewill is an act of autonomy using what limited perceptions we have in the moment and environment. Existential psychology is also sensitive to the absurdity of giving labels without accurate measurements which tends to have a dehumanizing effect on people (Corsini & Wedding, 2011). Regarding perceptions of isolation, in a society that may never recognize, accept, or understand us as individuals, we should explore and embrace what autonomy we can discover about ourselves. “The rights to express our thoughts,” “means something only if we are able to have thoughts of our own; freedom from external authority is a lasting gain only if the inner psychological conditions are such that we are able to establish our own individuality.” (Fromm 1941).
Our perceived connections with others and interpretations of who we are, relative to the pressures of the external environment, will be a perpetual struggle throughout our lives. While we try to find our place and autonomy within the limits of perceived reality, there will be external authorities trying to sell solutions, short cuts, and ways of avoiding feelings of dread. You will have to ask yourself, does the dread of feeling alone or personally responsible for all your decisions compel you to forgo your autonomy for the perceived structure that an external authority provides? Or do you embrace and face the perception of isolation and uncertainty that exists outside of groupthink? Will you grow more as an autonomous individual and be more cognitively equipped to identify quality relationships in your life by facing the unknown and dread? Is Dostoyevsky right in his conclusion about autonomy, “I have only in my life carried to an extreme what you have not dared to carry halfway, and what’s more, you have taken your cowardice for good sense, and have found comfort in deceiving yourselves. So that perhaps, after all, there is more life in me than in you.”
Corsini, R. & Wedding, D. (2011). Current Psychotherapies, 9th Edition. Brooks/Cole Cengage learning.
Dostoyevsky, F. (1864). Notes from the Underground. Digireads.com Publishing.
Fromm, E. (1941). Escape from Freedom. Holt Paperbacks.
